It’s been a week since my last post and it wouldn’t make sense for me to jump back in without processing a bit of the past week. After all, blogging is as much a devotional time for me as it is a writing discipline.
My wife and I lost both of our last two remaining grandparents. After a last minute flight to Omaha and a 4 hour drive to the small farming town of Red Cloud, we made it to the bedside of Jan’s grandpa. Although he was extremely weak, we trust that he heard our voices and little Ruby’s cry. Jan’s mom (Char) told him that we had all made it to be with him and that he was free to finally let go. The next morning, with Jan, Ruby and Char at his side, he took his last breath.
The night before we left for Kansas we spent an extended time with my 93 year old grandma who lives down here in San Diego. Her health was also deteriorating quickly and in our goodbye’s that evening, we had a sense it would be our last time with her. After all the family made it to her bedside, her son (my uncle) told her that we would be OK and she was free to finally let go. A couple days later, while in the Omaha airport to fly back to San Diego, I got the call that she had taken her last breath.
It was a week where the Entangled Theology of life and death was made a present reality.
The Pain
It’s strange turning the page on a whole generation. Our parents are now the grandparents and the page turns. The lives of our grandparents connected us to our heritage. With a combined 180 years of life, they were around when WWI was at its peak and the Model T had only recently hit the road. Further, they not only symbolize our roots in Ireland (Jan) and Sweden (me), but our childhood. Driving around the small farm town of Red Cloud, Janny reflected on all the summers she spent riding tractors, swimming in the community pool and running around her grandparent’s farmhouse. I think back to playing Little League and looking in the stands to see my grandma dialed into the action or when she would wake me up in the middle of the night to eat ice cream and play cards. It will be strange not having Ruby know these two like we did.
The Joy
These two lived relationally rich and long lives. To be honest, in their suffering towards the end, we prayed for a peaceful release from this life. While it hurts not to have them physically present, we have years of experiences to reflect on and share with our children. Further, it was incredible to be present with them in these final days. We have no regrets and are now realizing that one of the central purposes for our move to San Diego was to be able to spend so much time with my grandma in these final months as representatives of our whole family. Finally, as followers of the resurrected Jesus, we can’t help but be stirred to joy as we anticipate a reunion at the culmination of God’s restoration project for humanity.
Although a whirlwind of experiences and emotions that we would rather not have to endure anytime soon, we are reminded of the value of being fully present with those we love. May we represent and extend the legacy that our loved ones pass on to each of us.